Both the positive and the negative take place within our lifetime; and the negative events and issues often surface as the cumulative result of the petty emotions of our kokoro. The Ten Basic Teachings help us to lead fulfilling lives based on harmonious relationships with other people. Be conscious of the love for others and take the initiative to reflect this love in the way you live.
1. Family members, relatives, friends and neighbors strive to live in harmony.
Harmonize with the people in your life, especially with your spouse and children, and with others whom you meet or have ties to. Your existence begins to have meaning and purpose in an environment where conversations with family and friends are enjoyable. Strive to become the person who supports, encourages, and enhances the kokoro of family members who are the source of your happiness.
2. Strive to compromise.
Compromise that is needed to build harmony is reflected in the commonly held view, “don’t go against the tide.” It is to have the conviction to live in harmony with everyone, to be tolerant and accepting of their strengths and weaknesses.
3. Do not quarrel. Avoid conflicts.
To each his or her own—everyone is different. If we try to understand the different values that people have, are willing to listen to what others have to say, we gain the flexibility to discern the true motives of the people around us. This is what keeps us from hurting our self-respect as well as the self-respect of others.
4. Do not bear grudges. Forget the past.
Behind the grudges that people bear is the sense that “I’m right.” There is no such thing as a perfect human being. Thus, it’s better to let go of past events rather than becoming fixated and obsessive about them.
5. Do not hate other people. Forgive their wrongdoings.
Hating other people does not resolve anything and creates only unhappiness for yourself. Be generous of heart and forgive the other person. Strive to become a human being that understands the pain of others.
6. Do not engage in malicious gossip about others. Remember your past and self-reflect.
Before talking negatively about others, remember the many people who have cared, supported and forgiven your past mistakes. When you self-reflect, you realize that “we’re all in the same boat,” and the desire to become the person that you can be grows.
7. Do not give in to avarice. Wait for the right time.
All human beings are avaricious to a greater or lesser extent, but do not engage in excessive greed that affects the well-being of those around you. Always make your decisions rationally and your kokoro will experience satisfaction when you stay within your limits.
8. Meet your responsibilities. Don’t take on more than you can fulfill.
Do your utmost best to fulfill your responsibilities. Be honest with yourself about knowing what responsibilities you can or cannot meet. If you are sincere in your judgment, they will not become a burden; and you will be able to meet your responsibilities.
9. Do not betray others. Remember your disappointment and despair.
When we are loved, trusted, and relied on, we are able to expend much more than the strengths we have. Actively show and do to others what makes you happy and cultivate a kokoro that allows your strengths and their strengths to surface to their full extent.
10. Do not engage in selfish behavior and allow others their freedom.
All of us think of ourselves first and foremost. If someone’s outlook on life is forced on you, it becomes oppressive. Strive to be considerate of others and begin with those closest to you.